The Curious Case of Capt Lynch, Part 1

As the Father of the New Order and Saviour of Highsec, I have become somewhat prominent in the highsec community. I wouldn't necessarily describe myself as "famous", but I am extremely well-known and famous. Consequently, I get my fair share of private convo requests from people I don't know. Such requests are often the beginning of interesting EVE experiences.

I received a convo request out of the blue from someone named Capt Lynch. He wouldn't begin the conversation with a polite "hello" or "o/", so I decided I would.

He immediately started in on his grievance about his brother and an Agent or something.

From Capt's description of events, there were literal tears involved. This led me to believe there could be only one explanation:

Obviously Capt's brother was at fault, and the Agent was in the right. Facts were in short supply, but I had heard enough to know that much.

I had just solved another case, and in record time. Case closed. Or was it?

Capt switched gears abruptly, offering me advice. It's a rare condition in this day and age to get any good ideas from people who complain about the New Order. But I was willing to hear him out, if only so he could feel like he had a Supreme Protector who listens.

I was skeptical about Capt's pitch. He was going to double my income and increase my Agents' income by 50%? Or was the income of my Agents and I going to double by 50%? Either way, I'll believe it when I see it!

Capt's brilliant plan was to charge gankers for the right to gank miners in my territory. And if they don't pay, then what? They get Concorded?

Ganking should have as few impediments as possible, in my opinion. I certainly wouldn't add a fee, even a nominal one. I believe in open-source ganking. For the world.

Capt's well of creativity wouldn't stop flowing. His next big idea was to give miners an entire minute to prove they aren't AFK, because some people go to Jita and turn off local blink, or something like that...

Capt then proposed a plan wherein I would post extra warnings to miners with containers around the stargates of my territories.

It was as if every bad idea floating around highsec had merged into some kind of singularity in Capt's brain. He warned me that the changes coming in the winter expansion would leave me vulnerable to attack. For a proper analysis of how the changes will affect bumpers, you can check out this post.

I assured him I was plenty Invincible to deal with a few extra gankers, but he insisted.

From the beginning, I could tell there was more to this Capt Lynch fellow than met the eye. As he continued to rattle on, I vowed to get to the bottom of this mystery. Specifically I wanted to know, what was the deal with this guy? Above all else, I am interested in the truth. I would find answers.

To be continued...