Help Us Help You

Under New Order rule, highsec is a community. We can't return to the days when everyone tried to go it alone. If you want to succeed in modern highsec, you're going to need help. Fortunately, our Agents provide that help, free of charge. Permits cost 10 million isk, but the help is free.

To take advantage of our Agents' services, honesty is key. Carebears lie a lot, but they're bad at keeping secrets.

It's often said that life is what you make of it. Similarly, highsec is as safe as you make it. Carebears who refuse to make highsec safe for themselves have little room for complaint. They're like a man who walks into oncoming traffic and asks why roads are so hazardous.

In all of EVE history, there has been only one highsec revolution--ours. That's all highsec ever needed. There will be no uprising against the New Order.

After spending 10 million isk on a permit, Behe Motho made his kill right available to all for 1 isk and claimed he "misclicked". He certainly did. It was the worst click he ever made.

Behe needed help from the New Order. Despite paying some money, he chose to fight us instead. Protip: If you're trapped in a burning building, don't start attacking the firemen who come to rescue you.

Carebears project their own faults onto others. Duke Singberg hated PvP because he feared death. He threatened Agent Tisiphone Dira with the most frightening thing he could think of. But our Agents welcome PvP in all its forms. No wonder they're such gifted warriors; they have no fear.

Sportsmanship needs to make a comeback in EVE, I feel. It's about more than honour--it's common sense. If someone defeats you in battle, you don't get to look down on them. A carebear might, for instance, accuse gankers of being "bottom in human race". What does that make the ganker's victim, then? This is typical carebear logic, like when they complain that highsec PvP is too safe, and that highsec PvE needs to be safer.

Carebears always show their true colors when ganked. They can only bottle their rage for a line or two.

To become a proper EVE player, carebears must learn to stop being so angry when they lose a ship. As a PvP game, EVE is about losing ships and making others lose theirs. Suicide gankers lose their ships every time they attack. Imagine if a ganker got this worked up each time their Catalyst was destroyed!

Since we understand that EVE is a PvP game, and since PvP requires the possibility of losing one's ship, every carebear is in desperate need of anger management. They're playing a game that makes them angry by its very nature. Our Agents, therefore, have become experts in providing emotional support.

Even so, carebears often look for help in all the wrong places--like the official in-game "Help" channel.

Never trust advice from someone who loiters in the Help channel...

...unless that someone is an Agent of the New Order.

EVE is filled with players offering advice, most of it bad. When in doubt, check it out: If someone's "help" contradicts the Code, steer clear!