Highsec industrial corp The Sky Gods Fortune had a rising star: Its new mining director, TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet. Hired by CEO Scoot Sollete only 20 minutes earlier, TheInternet was already angling for a promotion to full director status.
Scoot Sollete > i just did a little more digging. after recruiting. on your killboard, it shows that you have an orca kill. blue on blueTheInternet also happened to be an accomplished awoxer whose adventures were publicized on MinerBumping. He was a deep-cover Agent of the New Order. Like James Bond, TheInternet managed to go on secret missions despite a flashy lifestyle that usually involved loud explosions. Also like Bond, he didn't bother using an alias. He was that good.
TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet > oh yeah that, lol
But when he asked to be made a full director, his new CEO found something suspicious on his killboard. There was no use denying it. The record clearly showed that TheInternet and fellow awoxer Thomas Duncan had ganked their corp's Orca pilot and podded him for good measure.
TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet > that guy totally deserved it, he was scamming new playersWithout missing a beat, TheInternet explained away the Orca awox. And he managed to do so while putting himself firmly in the anti-scammer camp.
TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet > he was "helping them move their stuff"
TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet > so we set him up to lose his orca
TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet > i paid a couple mercs to help take care of him though
Scoot Sollete > on eve who it doesn't show that he is a scammerDespite TheInternet's valiant attempt, Scoot wasn't buying it. He looked up the Orca pilot on EveWho.com and saw no evidence that he was a scammer.
In addition to tracking the membership of corps and alliances, EveWho is useful for doing background checks on individual EVE players. The site allows users to leave comments about the players. For example, if you looked up Agent loyalanon, you would find comments like these:
Random commenters often label scammers as such. Scoot saw nothing to suggest that the Orca pilot was a scammer.
TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet > eve who doesn't show a lot of thingsOf course, not every scammer attracts condemnation in EveWho comments. But if Scoot took a few seconds to look up TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet, he would find this:
Our hero had no way of knowing whether his CEO was, at that very moment, discovering the truth about his ambitious new recruit. So TheInternet simply did what he was trained to do. He maintained his cover as best he could.
TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet > as a freighter pilot, people who use freighting as a way to scam people pisses me offHe'd looked up the Orca pilot, but it never occurred to Scoot to use EveWho to look up TheInternet himself. Fortune favors the Code.
TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet > if killing a guy who does that makes me untrustworthy, i don't know what to tell you
TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet > i dont think its an overreaction at all
Scoot Sollete > mkay.
Scoot Sollete > I'll trust ya.
TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet > i'm an honorable guy, I'll watch your back as long as you watch mineThe storm had passed. Scoot was willing to overlook that pesky little Orca incident. Highsec is built on trust.
Scoot Sollete > mkay. I'll watch your back
TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet > alright, and I appreciate you being blunt with me and asking me about that km instead of just kicking me or something
Scoot Sollete > nah. I usually give people the benefit of the doubt at first.
Scoot Sollete > plus in hi sec, it's not like a lot of isk is at risk
TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet > I only want to earn ISK honestly, I'm not one to stealTheInternet explained that he had absolutely no interest in emergent gameplay like corp thefts and the like. The two agreed to put aside their suspicions and work together for the good of their corporation.
TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet > what I like about this game is the whole logistics and business end of things
TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet > like, mining asteroids in space might sound boring to people, but I just like the idea of figuring out efficient logistics networks for profitable mining operations lol
TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet > it sounds so autistic haha
Scoot Sollete > all good. point got across.
TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet > only 20 jumps out... from jitaEspionage can be a very nasty business. Sometimes, an operative is forced to do bad things to maintain their cover identity. To prove that he was just another bot-aspirant like the rest of the corp's members, TheInternet announced his intention to autopilot in a freighter.
TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet > in a freighter
TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet > sigh
Scoot Sollete > damn
TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet > I think I'm just going to YOLO this one and hit autopilot
TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet > alright, when I get to Jita I'm going to start picking up what I need to get the buyback off the groundLess than 80 minutes after joining the corp, TheInternet was promoted to full director status.
TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet > can you get me set up with director so I can get all the hangars/wallets structured and play with it
Scoot Sollete > kk
Scoot Sollete > you're a director now.
TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet > cool, thanks
To be continued...
Wow, those are some epic tears on loyalanon's EveWho page.
ReplyDeleteI CANT WAIT FOR PART 3!!!
DeleteWhat can I say I cry like a bitch at the drop of a hat. But as soon as I move out of my moms basement and learn to change my own diaper I hope to out grow that.
DeleteHaha never "change" PoopAnon
DeleteThese carebears are so inept. It nearly takes the honor out of victory. Nearly.
ReplyDeleteYou really like that movie "The Patriot", I take it =p
DeleteTruth in words my dear. These carebears ARE inept... it's almost painful to read about their complete failures at EVE, but still TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet carried out his duty with all honor and precision. I just hope that Scoot Sollete thanks him for the valuable lesson he has been given.
DeleteYou sound mad bro.
DeleteHere's a tissue.
nah not mad just right thats all .
Deletehere's your tissue back
He mad ^^
DeleteDelusional? Maybe. Filled with impotent rage? Definitely. Right? Only in your dreams.
Deletehe muppet ^^
Deletepixels all just pixels.
DeleteExactly Anon11:43. Just pixels. But there are people who seem to get butthurt over them. And I find that rather amusing in a "what the hell is wrong with you" sort of way.
Deleteyour all as bad as each other just in different ways you do your thing with the pixels and they get pissed off about the pixels none of it means a damn thing
DeleteSomeone's gotta be pretty bumphurt to accuse Kane of cheating.
ReplyDeleteThe funny thing is I'll bet that Kane has not even given those comments a first or second thought... just another plaintive cry of bitterness in the void.
DeleteSince I'm internet famous and a damn rich lawyer in RL I have a Eve Who page also:
ReplyDeletehttp://evewho.com/pilot/Veers+Belvar
Although the commenter is wrong Bennington is my alt not the other way around. Also you can tell by my corp history I have a love/hate relationship with the swordmasters. People often mistake me for Tom Cruze or Justin Timberlake, must be that smile i have.
Your hairstyle always reminds me of that movie "There's something about Mary", especially the scene where Mary uses the hair product... just something about that wave. Maybe you are using the same stuff?
Deletemeh seems made up
ReplyDelete