Kills of the Week

You know, bot-aspirancy is insidious. It starts with a little AFK mining here, a little autopiloting there. But bot-aspirancy always wants more. Before long, you won't even recognize yourself. If left untreated, a carebear can become like some of the people ganked by the New Order during the week of January 8th @ 00:00 EVEtime through January 14th @ 23:59 EVEtime. Only then is the true horror realized.

Buckle up, it's about to get bumpy.

KILLMAIL

kidcash shocked highsec with his staggering 41 billion isk Bowhead loss. What more can we say about this incident? Agents Darnoth, ZAKURELL0 LINDA, Ido Adudu, Ganku Desu, SKAfan, Flamboyant Surprise, Ampelius Loukianos, Heisenberg Hemah, Ilsanore Lea, Lawrence Lawton, Reggie Thistleton, Bint Bint, Pardon The Interruption, Arobaz, Orn Ehmstein, Another ShadeOfWhyte, Eugenie Brazier, Morrigan Laima, Gea Stormbound, Shazna Solta, Joe Kouvo, Pure Whyte, 4R084Z, Mack Poddington, Explosive Mooses, James Poddington, Skiff Poddington, Hulk Poddington, Sorg-frae, Mon Mothmaa, Jack Spratley, SonicBlackRight, and Fat Tawate were on patrol in Niarja at the time, and thank goodness.

And then...

KILLMAIL

Another appalling Bowhead was lost in the same system: Aliella lost one worth 27 billion isk. It, too, was tanked. In fact... It had the same fit as kidcash's Bowhead. Come to think of it, kidcash and Aliella belong to the same small corp. You don't suppose...

I'm afraid it's true. After kidcash lost a 41 billion isk Bowhead, he switched to his alt and lost a 27 billion isk Bowhead an hour and a half later. This guy seems determined to become the next X-FEANOR.

Agents Arobaz, Another ShadeOfWhyte, Morrigan Laima, Pure Whyte, Bratok Srayona, ZAKURELL0 LINDA, eC Cade, Captain Edward England, Pig of Fury, Piper Banner, Darnoth, Bint Bint, Eugenie Brazier, Gea Stormbound, 4R084Z, Shazna Solta, Captain Cortar, Joe Kouvo, Pardon The Interruption, Sorg-frae, Synamic, Origo Lim, Disposable Cracker, Mon Mothmaa, and Dani Otsolen eliminated the second Bowhead--along with its 3.3 billion isk pod.

KILLMAIL

Tomisch en Welle demonstrated why our Agents continue to destroy every Venture they can find. Agent Tisiphone Dira showed Tomisch no mercy but the mercy of the Code.

Upon terminating Tomisch's fail-fit Venture, Tisiphone recovered a pair of PLEX. Some "new players" drop better loot than those fancy NPCs out in nullsec.

KILLMAIL

Modules. Who needs 'em? That was the thinking of Garek Lanister, who waltzed into Uedama without a care in the world. Agent Votre Dieu quickly put an end to Garek's vulgar display.

KILLMAIL

Val Achi's 1.6 billion isk Marauder was an expensive example of a combat ship with a capacitor tank. Agents Zane Arnolles, Jaxi Wreckful, Fiddly Pop, Jeni Savage, Lillie Naari, Ron Chi, and Jana Grebb were puzzled by what they saw. Was Val on drugs? Actually, he might've been.

Val was indeed carrying a unit of drugs in his cargo. But as we all know, the most dangerous drug in highsec--the one with the deadliest of side effects--is bot-aspirancy itself. If you're mining in highsec and you take a bathroom break with your ship still sitting in the asteroid belt, it's basically a gateway drug. Before long, you'll find yourself losing everything you own in an AFK Bowhead.

KILLMAIL

Agent ST0NER SMURF and his friends have been very busy of late. jacquelynn a bolton was one of countless pilots to be podded by them last week. She was AFK autopiloting in a naked 3.5 billion isk Capsule. Pretty reckless behavior.

Did jacquelynn plug in that Slave Beta implant instead of a Snake one by mistake? I suppose it doesn't matter now. All those implants are gone, so jacquelynn can start fresh. I hear New Order mining permits are on sale... Only 10 million isk!