Code Ready Gelhan, Part 6

Previously, on MinerBumping... Agent Kalorned launched a campaign to enforce the Code in the Gelhan system, which was infested by miners from the gargantuan Mission Ready Mining corporation. Kalorned easily took over the system and the MRM miners scattered like cockroaches. But soon MRM called in support from friendly PvP alliances in the area, including Vendetta Mercenary Group.

Pheonix Jr > lol
Pheonix Jr > ur bad
Pheonix Jr > leave tether you sackless mongoloid
Kalorned > Only once you learn some manners young man
Pheonix Jr > grow a pair vagina

Pheonix Jr of Vendetta Mercenary Group demanded that Kalorned face him in a duel. Our Agent already told him about the three Tests in the Code, but Pheonix wasn't interested.

Kalorned > You of course will also have to demonstrate your honor as previously noted
Pheonix Jr > Kalorned too come up with meaningless excuses to avoid fights
Beers OfWar > but im guessing you'd rage hard if you lost that orthrus
Beers OfWar > it would explain why you're such a puss with it
Kalorned > ya'll are doing great
Beers OfWar > ur garbage bro its okay

The altercation in local attracted a crowd. They insisted that Kalorned stop bumping miners and engage in PvP on their own terms. Otherwise they would subject our Agent to dire consequences: More insults in local chat.

Kalorned > No one ever wants to finish one of the three tests to duel? why is that
Kalorned > Kalorned can only guess that everyone is lazy
Ozora Tsasa > no, we just dont like bully fucks picking on our miners. GTFO
Beers OfWar > allow duals ye pussy
Beers OfWar > defend your honor

The insults and tears weren't effective, so Kalorned's challengers resorted to a strategy that one might call "hostile begging".

Uber Fackerie > the 3 tests that james 315 created because he knew that new order plebs lacked sufficient skill. These tests were made so that members had a way out of legitimate pvp
Uber Fackerie > FACT
Kalorned > Just complete the test then
Pheonix Jr > fckin pleb
Beers OfWar > still sais pussy when i dual request you
Kalorned > You may need a new video card

Kalorned brushed off the nonsense. After years of dealing with Code violators, he was used to it.

Beers OfWar > get rekt by this brutix plebian so i can move this shit talk to comments sextion of Zkill
Uber Fackerie > oh it definitely says pussy
Uber Fackerie > CCP actually coded it in for all new order RP fuckbags
Beers OfWar > defend your honor swine

Our Agent identified a representative of yet another mercenary alliance: Uber Fackerie was a member of Short Bus Mercenaries. How many organizations were affiliated with Mission Ready Mining?

Beers OfWar > who the fuck wont fight a brutix with an orthrus
Beers OfWar > if i were in an orthrus getting dualed by a brutix i would totes demolish said brutix
Beers OfWar > 2007 and this garbage at eve
Beers OfWar > he has been playing 15$ a month since 2007 to be the most risk adverse plebian iv met lol

MRM and its friends were powerless to stop Kalorned from bumping and ganking. They were equally powerless to persuade him to abandon the Code. Time for a new approach:

Fly Fearless, the alliance that Mission Ready Mining belongs to, initiated a wardec. Kalorned was now at war with over 2,400 pilots.

...Actually, that's not totally accurate. The New Order Gamis Affiliates was the corp that Kalorned's gank alts belonged to. Kalorned himself, who did all the bumping, was a member of a different corporation, Psychedelic Llamas. Thus, MRM had paid for a war with a corp filled with -10 security status Catalyst pilots. As for Kalorned, they could only give him the carebear stare.

Kalorned > o/ Lurswena Ice - You will need a permit to mine tonight
Lurswena Ice > Kalorned yeah, then come gank me
Lurswena Ice > or wait Im to fat for you! :D
Lurswena Ice > this is boring.. I guess will go sleep

The next day, Kalorned returned to the Gelhan belts and bumped as usual. One by one, the MRM miners "got bored", "were full", or suddenly "felt like doing something else".

Kalorned > o/ Ragnar gunn Alexander - you will need a mining permit to mine tonight
Klarice Bloodborne > lul, permit my nuts.
Justin Enderas > Oooh, Kalorned is here :o
Kalorned > o/
Kalorned > o/ Belshil Ataru You need a mining permit to mine tonight

Bumping is a great way to induce denial in a carebear. They simply can't believe that a bumper can stop them from mining. It doesn't make sense to them. This can cause a miner to become even more disconnected from reality than usual:

Slippy Nip > guess he doesnt
Slippy Nip > Seems to mining fine atm
Slippy Nip > You shouldnt be trying to show authority when you have none kid
Kalorned > Do go on, I'm interested to hear more about how one mines while docked

Slippy Nip went into denial. He claimed that bumping didn't do anything, and he pretended that MRM was still happily mining away in Gelhan.

Slippy Nip > go check the belts mate
Kalorned > checked
Slippy Nip > just because you chase one or two miners away doesnt mean theyre not instantly replaced by others
Kalorned > Ai, look at all the replacements here

In fact, Gelhan's ice anomaly and all of its asteroid belts were now empty of miners. Kalorned admired the newly Code-compliant system.

Behind the scenes, the members of MRM were furious. This "Code" business had gone on long enough. They urged their mercenary friends to declare war on Kalorned's corp.

To be continued...