Anti-Ganking Was There

When expensive freighters die, two questions inevitably arise: First, where was Anti-Ganking? And second, how can Anti-Gankers be so bad at preventing freighter ganks? Unlike miner ganking, which can theoretically occur anywhere in highsec at any time, freighter ganks are highly predictable. A targeted freighter often gets bumped for 30 minutes or longer, telegraphing the impending gank to an absurd degree. Under these conditions, EVE's game mechanics--faction police, CONCORD, jamming and remote reps--would strongly favor a group of even mildly competent anti-gankers.

Erich Einstein > you are far off the gate log out
nate dogg > y u so far away dude????
Erich Einstein > maybe they wont get there in time
Erich Einstein > Throw out a cans so people can warp to you.
nate dogg > me?
Erich Einstein > na, the freighter
Alexander Kaan > anyone, really

...However, Anti-Ganking isn't known for its competence. No one ever accused them of being a well-oiled machine. Today, we'll take you inside the Anti-Ganking channel to document an actual case of Anti-Gankers showing up to a gank and trying to stop it. We don't need to ask the question, "Where was Anti-Ganking?" The second question, on the other hand, will be very much in play.

nate dogg > looks like a trap 2 kill me lol this channel shady lol
XiaoMi Kurosaki > can out
Alexander Kaan > at least until the bumping gets it too far again
Erich Einstein > ganks already have plenty of members to warp in too. The can is so AG can get to you easier
nate dogg > sry im unsure wot 2 do lol
nate dogg > im in a t3 cruisers i cant replace.....

Anti-Gankers were alerted to a "bump in progress" in the Perimeter system. As usual, the rebels were disorganized and distrustful of one another.

Banjo Snapper > bump the mach away
Banjo Snapper > block him from bumping me
Banjo Snapper > pls
Erich Einstein > shield and armor repair drones on the freighter. cheap fast locking ships to take out cats fast

A freighter piloted by Banjo Snapper found itself repeatedly bumped by a Machariel. He urgently requested help from the Anti-Ganking channel. Since the bumping went on for a long time, there was ample opportunity for help to arrive. A small fleet of rebels gathered in Perimeter to save the freighter.

Banjo Snapper > pls
Banjo Snapper > everybody just ram the mach away from me
nate dogg > sry dude i dont want 2 b cannon fodder lol
Banjo Snapper > how cna you be cannon fodder
Banjo Snapper > just mwd into the mach
Banjo Snapper > if they shoot you they get concorded
nate dogg > i could b ganked 2 lol

At first, Banjo had been relieved to see so many would-be rescuers flocking to the scene. But as time went on, Banjo grew increasingly alarmed. Did these Anti-Gankers know what they were doing?

Erich Einstein > the gank team will have short range blasters most likely, use something snipey and cheap and you will be fine
Banjo Snapper > dude thewyre not gonna gank your t1 bs
Banjo Snapper > just block the damn mach
Banjo Snapper > please

Minutes ticked by and Banjo was no closer to escaping the Machariel bumps than before. The freighter pilot's pleas for help grew desperate.

Steamjunk > do we know what the freighter is carrying?
Banjo Snapper > do we have rrigs on grid?
Banjo Snapper > *frigates?
Erich Einstein > I have a 500 dps cat on grid
Alexander Kaan > probably won't save you but it's worth trying

Banjo watched the Anti-Gankers in disbelief. Why were they bringing frigates? Anti-Gankers don't need to worry about being CONCORDed. There was no risk. Banjo couldn't believe that the rescue team wasn't armed with more powerful ships.

Erich Einstein > good job on the ibis... that was the warpin ship
Alexander Kaan > no, they used it to aggress the freighter
Alexander Kaan > so he can't logoff
Alexander Kaan > it got concorded
Erich Einstein > It wont help now
Alexander Kaan > it already helped
Alexander Kaan > it gave freighter a 15 min timer

To prevent Banjo from simply logging off to escape the Machariel bumps, one of the gankers sent a rookie ship to aggress Banjo's freighter. It's a common tactic that's been around for many years, yet it caused some confusion among the Anti-Gankers.

Steamjunk > try having him set speed to zero, do not try to warp or align
Steamjunk > when i bump into freighters doing that on the jita undock, they dont go far, its a weirdness of eve physics
Alexander Kaan > gank fleet on grid
Alexander Kaan > get away from zero unless you want to die
Steamjunk > lot of talos, he must be carrying a ton

At last, the moment arrived. A massive gank fleet with 18 Taloses came out of warp next to the freighter. Time for the Anti-Gankers to work their magic!

Erich Einstein > sorry man, you dont have enough support
Alexander Kaan > I told him what to do but he insists webbing himself
Alexander Kaan > instead of doing osmething more useful with his alt
Maximilien Robespierre Patrouette > You can't fix stupid Alex.

Before the freighter even went halfway into structure, the Anti-Gankers were busy making recriminations and shifting the blame for their failure. In this, at least, the Anti-Gankers were well trained.

Banjo, who belonged to the ironically named Highsec Pubbie Stomping Grounds corp, lost his 23.6 billion isk freighter. As he contemplated moving forward in EVE without his stuff, Banjo looked at the Anti-Ganking chat and snapped.

Banjo Snapper > thought youd actually have a clue what youre doing considering itsa the channels entire purpose
Banjo Snapper > instead jusat a bunch of useless retarded sitting on me at zero in vigils and shittles
Banjo Snapper > gj boys
Banjo Snapper > gr8 help

Like all other carebears in his situation, Banjo had to face reality and see the Anti-Gankers for what they really were. He let them have it.

Alexander Kaan > it could help if you could follow some basic instructions
Alexander Kaan > instead of ignoring my tips
Alexander Kaan > also, we don't owe you anything
Alexander Kaan > and you calling us retards makes me think you are better off as a wreck

As usual, the rebels made each other miserable. Anti-Ganking was as toxic as ever.

Maximilien Robespierre Patrouette > Instead of just bitching Banjo Snapper, did you bother to follow any instructions Alexander Kaan gave?
Erich Einstein > dude you are attacking me
Erich Einstein > Alexander Kaan really man
Alexander Kaan > sorry dude, not sure what you were doing

Suddenly, the argument was interrupted by additional combat occurring on the grid. One Anti-Ganker started shooting another by mistake.

Alexander Kaan > why suspect?
Erich Einstein > picking up ganker loot so they cant get it
Alexander Kaan > ganker loot is BLUE
Alexander Kaan > unless you are trying to loot the 20B in the freighter, which won't probably fit in a catalyst's cargo
Erich Einstein > thats why ag wont ever amount to nothing

The only rational course of action for both freighter and Anti-Ganker alike: Embrace the Code. Otherwise, they must be condemned to an eternity of nothing but failure.