Kills of the Week

EVE is supposed to be fun. Losing ships isn't fun--if you have the wrong attitude. Our Agents have it right: "I'm going to enjoy losing my ship to CONCORD while ganking this miner." The carebears, on the other hand, are so sour when they lose their ships. They grind out their PvE like a job, and then they get mad when they lose a round of PvP. If you can't enjoy PvE or PvP, what's left? Tears.

Let's take a look at some carebears who lost at PvP during the week of October 8th @ 00:00 EVEtime through October 14th @ 23:59 EVEtime. Shall we?

Kjilrik lost about a quarter of a billion isk when his anti-tanked Retriever went down. The offending module was an ORE Expanded Cargohold. It ever-so-slightly increased the amount of ore Kjilrik could hold--while costing several times as much as the Retriever itself. Agents Alyth Nerun and Ima Wreckyou happily scooped the blingy module and sold it. They undoubtedly took note of the purchaser's name, so don't be surprised if we see it again.

KILLMAIL

People like Bokushi hypocritically complain about lack of opportunities to defend themselves, all while anti-tanking their flimsy haulers almost to death. Agents Radiant VanDenBerg and V-ktor Dolus had the privilege of defeating Bokushi on the battlefield. What they found inside Bokushi's cargo bay shocked them:

Bokushi was transporting his wardrobe, along with 500 units of PLEX. Keep in mind that earlier this year, CCP succumbed to the whining carebears' demands to make PLEX 100% safe by allowing it to be teleported like isk instead of hauled from station to station. Incredibly, Bokushi still managed to lose 1.5 billion isk of PLEX. He is almost certainly a bot-aspirant. I mean, just look at the evidence.

KILLMAIL

Corvuss laid his Providence to rest in Uedama, where it joined the rest of the Code-violating freighters. It was tanked, yes, but bringing an unlicensed freighter into Uedama is little better than activating the ship's self-destruct sequence and going AFK for a few minutes.

Agents Miros Homar, Elite Highsec PvP, BAE B BLUE, BAE B PEW, Unfit ForDoody, Jack Fizzleblade, Gea Stormbound, Emergent Gameplay, ClearLove, Darnoth, Lawrence Lawton, Bluekiss, Selina Love, ZAKURELL0 LINDA, Ivana Freemam, Ciek Ciekawski, Hulk Poddington, Mack Poddington, SP104FREDERIC, James Poddington, Yojiro, Ronnie Botten, Skiff Poddington, Padme Love, Bielun Agrest, Archibald Fizzleblade, Basic Black Bitch, Franz Fizzleblade, Karl Friedrich Fizzleblade, Lunar Love, Hagen Fizzleblade, Pat Makunt, Gottfried Fizzleblade, Rosanna Love, Walther Fizzleblade, Sharon Arran, Hermann Fizzleblade, Yuliana Tang, and Sadepilveni destroyed the expensive freighter--which was also violating the Code by carrying too much cargo--and reclaimed 13 billion isk from its wreck.

KILLMAIL

I wonder, what manner of jump freighter pilot gets ganked in highsec, when he can easily jump-drive out at any time? The aptly named minus one JF gives us the answer: The same kind of pilot who equips 870 million isk worth of ORE anti-tank modules. minus one JF went AFK and autopiloted her way into the loving embrace of Agents Sinister Minister, Leeroy, Mallory, Yasashi konma, BAE B PEW, BAE B BLUE, Bint Bint, Pure Whyte, Elite Highsec PvP, Yojiro, Shazna Solta, Emergent Gameplay, Hermann Fizzleblade, Another ShadeOf Whyte, Jack Fizzleblade, Karl Friedrich Fizzleblade, Sophie Whyte, Archibald Fizzleblade, Gea Stormbound, Franz Fizzleblade, Unfit ForDoody, Hagen Fizzleblade, Captain Cortar, Gottfried Fizzleblade, Synamic, Walther Fizzleblade, Bluekiss, ClearLove, Lunar Love, Selina Love, Basic Black Bitch, Ashley Whyte, Padme Love, Rosanna Love, Eel Soup, and Tom Jamess.

KILLMAIL

ALTxF4 did something crazy this week: He took his 3.2 billion isk pod out for a little stroll, sans ship. He must've been AFK and autopiloting, otherwise even a pod-killing expert like Agent Eva Mavas would've had trouble catching him.

There was a lot of stuff in this pod, but I guess ALTxF4 didn't think any of it was worth protecting behind the hitpoints of a ship.

KILLMAIL

Mira Padecaina's 3.3 billion isk pod edged out the previous one by the narrowest of margins. Mira, too, had a naked pod. If this is a trend, it's one our Agents will stamp out. Agent Pod-Goo Repoman did not hesitate to shatter the unlicensed Capsule.

Asklepian set? More like AFKlepian. What a Goofus.