Kills of the Week

It was another rough week for the bot-aspirants of highsec. Rebel freighters were hammered again, with at least 50 freighters and 11 jump freighters being destroyed from April 15th @ 00:00 EVEtime through April 21st @ 23:59 EVEtime, and more dying through the weekend. This carnage, on par with the original Burn Jita event, took the carebears completely by surprise. They assumed that the freighter ganking would end eventually, but it didn't. They tried to call our bluff, but we weren't bluffing, we were killing everybody. Classic mistake. I guess the carebears aren't any better at poker than they are at EVE.

KILLMAIL

x'X'x heard it a million times: "Don't buy a permit. Fly a tanked Skiff, and they'll never be able to gank you." The miner kept these words close to his heart as he purchased his Skiff and filled its mids with shield tank modules. The words began to fade as he equipped yield mods instead of tank. And his head was filled with a new song entirely as he bought a pair of ORE Strip Miners. The tragic unraveling of this guy's life took place over the course of minutes. Agents Luna Nightblood, Ralliana, and Underpaid Ship Mechanic nodded at each other and swung the axe, decapitating the Skiff.

KILLMAIL

Peleus Visteen was determined not to be like all those other Deep Space Transport pilots who get caught with inertia stabs and cargo expanders. No, he would fill his lowslots with tank. Unfortunately, he chose his tank modules with a random number generator, and he pretty much left the rest of his ship blank. Yet again, a curt nod from Agents Luna Nightblood, Ralliana, and Underpaid Ship Mechanic and a swiftly falling blade put an end to the nonsense.

KILLMAIL

Remember when Bowheads were supposed to spell the end of freighter ganks? Lois Zyphier tanked his Bowhead, loaded it up with cargo--and then made a terrible mistake. His mistake allowed a Hurricane pilot to freely fire upon his vessel, which was then finished off by a bunch of gankers from the mighty CODE. alliance. Truth be told, it doesn't much matter which aggression mechanic was at play here, for Lois' mistake was the same regardless: He failed to obey the Code. He was judged by Agents Amadeo Giannini, Ruby Rozei, Sherri Rozei, Trump The King, Baron Rozei, Lagatha Rozei, Katy Rozei, Tawny Rozei, Giselle Rozei, Ivanka Rozei, Shanade Rozei, and holdmybeer.

KILLMAIL

LLIyXeP Assene is obviously a bot. You can tell, he just has one of those faces. And even if he wasn't technically botting here, he was guilty of bot-aspirancy. That sealed his fate. LLIyXeP went to Jita, where he assumed he'd be safe. In actual fact, he was being closely watched by the Tax Collector family. LLIyXeP, you see, was a tax cheat and a fugitive from justice. But only until he was apprehended by Agents Australian Excellence, Tax Collector HongMei, Tax Collector Larry, Taxman Daniel, Tax Collector Aruka, Tax Collector Richard, Tax Collector Alison, Tax Collector Kimi, Tax Collector Hill, Tax Collector AynRand, Tax Collector BokChoy, Tax Collector Stroheim, Tax Collector KarlMarx, Tax Collector Max, Pod Destroyer Molly, Tax Collector Kittens, Tax Collector Fuemi, Tax Collector Buck, Tax Collector Shardani, Tax Collector Yuna, and Dr Hattrick.

KILLMAIL

ByeBye YouYou was a killmail waiting to happen. Fifty-five billion isk? Even X-FEANOR is probably laughing at this guy, wherever he is.

Agents Mitten's Mittens, Ivana Freemam, Esibel, Lawrence Lawton, James Poddington, Tobias Frank, Jack Fizzleblade, Nion Nostro, Matt18002, Evgeni Malkin, Lil Bobby Tables, Bob Painter, Unfit ForDoody, Yojiro, Blasty McVoidFace, Helfeln Meathead, Inspector Implant, Walther Fizzleblade, big brutor one, Mack Poddington, Archibald Fizzleblade, ClearLove, Hulk Poddington, big brutor two, Hagen Fizzleblade, Gottfried Fizzleblade, Skiff Poddington, Lutz Fizzleblade, Emergent Gameplay, Hermann Fizzleblade, Rick Nederlander, Erich Fizzleblade, Ling Ling Pew, Annette Stetille, K0mand0 Sperg, Syzzel, Sputter, Saint LanGa, Yankov Fang, Padre Gankero, SdeeeL, Zim Mabata, Heliar Quasar, Tarwin JR, dAbOsSlAdY77, Menkooro Nostro, Anna-Marie Yanumano, Collateralized Contracts, and Perlo Tissant ambushed the bling-boat at Jita 4-4 and fell upon its corpse.

Ah, the guiltiest bit of the cargo.

...And another handful were destroyed for good measure. Always nice to take some 'Excavator' Mining Drones off the chessboard.

KILLMAIL

Isanamo Sam should've stayed in Isanamo. But like so many others, he was fatally tempted by the siren song of Uedama. Once Sam's billion isk hauler was dashed upon the rocks, Agent Baron Rozei sniped the 3.3 billion isk pod. After that, there was nothing left of Isanamo Sam.

Yes, Sam was a nomad indeed. If only he'd never left home. He should've bought a permit, too.