Saturday, November 30, 2019

Tugging at the Hems of Power, Part 5

Previously, on MinerBumping... Agent Kalorned was attacked by Tug Industries Corporation, who tried and failed to gank him in retaliation for bumping their unlicensed Orca. At times, the miners tried to negotiate with (or beg for mercy from) our Agent. Kalorned sensed that the miners still had hate in their hearts. Only time would tell what the next day would bring.


Kalorned's return began with a bang--specifically, the explosion of a fail-fit Retriever.


Though the ganked miner was not a member of the corp, Tug Industries pilots quickly took an interest. The New Order of Highsec was back.


Folg3r Tinlan openly schemed in local. It was clear that he still did not embrace the Code.


Armed with kill rights against Kalorned's -10 security status friends, Tug Industries hoped to find a way to strike back.


...But they failed. Adding insult to injury, one of their own was ganked right in front of them.


Like the rest of his corpmates, Killxone was furious. When he noticed Agent Kalorned resting innocently in the system's only station, Killxone couldn't restrain himself.


Agent Kalorned tested the miners by feigning ignorance of the previous day's events.


But the rebellious miners could not be so easily turned away. They demanded justice for their wrecked mining barges and bump-drunk Orca.


The more that Kalorned asserted his innocence, the angrier the miners became. But what could they do about it?


zandar Melkan, a miner from a different corp who lived in the area, announced that he had contacted his powerful friends in nullsec. Since there was nothing to do in nullsec, they were being deployed to highsec.


Tug Industries surrounded the station, baying for Kalorned's blood.


Our Agent kindly asked the miners to explain themselves. They were not interested in having a conversation, though.


The restless highsec system had become host to a lynch mob. Violence was inevitable.

To be continued...

Friday, November 29, 2019

Tugging at the Hems of Power, Part 4

Previously, on MinerBumping... Agent Kalorned triumphed over Tug Industries Corporation, which unsuccessfully attempted to stop him from engaging in a relaxing Orca-bumping session. But the rebels were too angry to stop resisting the Code.


Suddenly, Kalorned's Orthrus came under attack again. This time, the rebels used an actual ganking ship with a ganking fit. They were serious about killing Kalorned now.


For years, carebears have whined that ganking is too easy and too difficult to counter. In dealing with Kalorned, Tug Industries pilots finally discovered that the grass was not so green on the other side--sort of like their killboard. However, they had anticipated that one Thrasher would not be enough.


...Which is why they brought three Thrashers. In a simultaneous assault, the Thrashers pounced on Kalorned. It was almost like these miners had become real gankers.


Nevertheless, Kalorned's Orthrus survived the attack. The Tug Industries pilots had assumed that elite PvP was as easy as our Agents make it look. They were wrong. And they lacked the Code.


The leader of the gank squad, Skrymir Ornulf, invited Kalorned to a private convo. Our Agent expected some tears, which he got. But Skrymir had other motives, too.


The miner was slowly coming to grips with the fact that Kalorned was far more powerful than he--indeed, more powerful than Skrymir's entire corporation.


So Skrymir came up with a new strategy: Begging Kalorned for money and advice.


Kalorned understood that the only way to truly help these miners learn EVE was to make them work for it.


Our Agent tested Skrymir by offering to provide him with intel that could be gleaned using a 5,000 isk ship scanner. All the intel would cost was 500 million isk. But the miner was too greedy to part with it.


Alas, begging got Skrymir nowhere. The rebels of Tug Industries would need to find some other means of resisting.


Just when all hope seemed lost, Folg3r Tinlan managed to get on the CONCORD mail of one of Krominal's gank frigates. This act breathed new hope into the fledgling anti-Code movement.


As excited as Folg3r was, he had no illusions. This thing wasn't over yet. Both sides dug in for what promised to be a bitter fight to the finish.

To be continued...

Thursday, November 28, 2019

Fantastic Bot-Aspirants, Part 2

Previously, on MinerBumping... Solomon Iskander lost billions when he failed a courier contract due to his hauler getting ganked. Solomon reported to the MinerBumping channel to rage against the Code. Eventually, however, his desire to get reimbursement isk led him to buy a couple of mining permits.


Despite purchasing some mining permits, Solomon's attitude was not improved. In fact, he seemed put out by the whole thing.


As always, our Agents attempted to create a happy, positive environment. The moody miner wasn't very receptive, however.


One of the problems faced by the carebear was his lack of faith in the New Order and its Code. He was willing to buy permits, but it was as though he expected to be scammed. He could imagine nothing but bad things happening to him--yet all he could do about it was complain.


Mining permits are extremely effective at filtering highsec minerdom. Good miners are happy when they buy a permit. Bad miners only get grumpier.


Guess which kind of miner Solomon was?


Our Agents were astonished by Solomon's undignified and passive-aggressive behavior. Didn't he care about the effect that his tantrum was having on new players?


Now that he had some permits to his name, Solomon felt he was in a good position to pen a lengthy reimbursement request to the Saviour of Highsec. As recounted in the latest edition of the Highsec Miner Grab Bag, Solomon's request was denied at the last second because he made the mistake of displaying anti-Code material in his bio.


Solomon sent out his reimbursement mail and waited for a reply. He remained in the MinerBumping channel--and continued to sulk.


Against all odds, the miner was as cantankerous as ever. Nothing could cheer him up. Perhaps his mind was preoccupied with thoughts of isk. But this would mean that Solomon was a bot-aspirant.


And just like that, he was gone.


And just like that, he was back.


Suddenly, Agent Lewak got an idea: Killing miners always cheered him up, so maybe Solomon's mood could be improved by ganking a miner?


Unfortunately, Solomon chose not to join our Agents on a gank party. Instead, he attempted to resume his illegal hauling activities. This time he used a fail-fit cruiser. Less than an hour later, he was ganked by the same Agents who had killed his hauler--and in the same location. Billions more were lost. A few days later, Solomon suffered a baffling Orca loss when he inexplicably picked a fight with a battlecruiser in Dodixie.


After everything he'd experienced, Solomon still craved isk. As for his reimbursement request...


Let's just say it's not looking good.

Wednesday, November 27, 2019

Fantastic Bot-Aspirants, Part 1


Beware the carebear who was ganked for "absolutely no reason".


A furious Solomon Iskander entered the MinerBumping channel and demanded to know why his Occator had been ganked.


Said Occator was carrying 4.8 billion isk, which suggested one reason why it might have been ganked.


Solomon insisted that he hadn't been on autopilot at the time. Yet he was ganked by a group of Nordwind. pilots who are known for feasting upon autopiloting Deep Space Transports.


To learn the truth of the matter, our Agents put Solomon to the test. Was he an honest fellow--or just a bot-aspirant who once had 10 million isk to spare?


Fearing that the Agents might have found a Code violation, Solomon tried to cover his tracks.


Almost immediately, the carebear expressed doubts and cynicism. It did not appear that he had much respect for highsec's Code enforcers.


Less than 5 minutes into the conversation, Solomon unleashed a torrent of profanity against the Code and highsec's Saviour. A Goofus cannot hide his true nature for long.


Solomon raged. His chances of scoring reimbursement isk plummeted. This, in turn, made the miner even more sour.


The typical bot-aspirant can barely stand being in the company of humans; they can only tolerate a conversation if they feel they can get money out of it.


Solomon pretended to be disgusted by Agents not following their own Code. But if he truly wished to pursue this line of argument, he probably shouldn't have opened with "fuck the Code".


In addition to the 4.8 billion isk Occator loss, Solomon revealed that he'd lost another 4 billion isk on collateral for the failed courier contract. Non-compliance is expensive. Despite his hatred for the New Order and its Code, Solomon desperately needed reimbursement isk.


...So he purchased two mining permits. Would it be enough?

To be continued...