Kills of the Week

Bot-aspirant carebears can be stubborn. They're creatures of habit, to be sure--they rely on routines and subroutines. Yet our Agents are able to rescue many of them. How? By jolting them out of their ruts. A good gank can do wonders. Here are a few good ganks from the week of December 22nd @ 00:00 EVEtime through December 28th @ 23:59 EVEtime...

KILLMAIL

If you look closely, you'll see some specks of purple in Marcel Sweetin's Paladin. All of that bling bloated his ship to nearly 10 billion isk. By now, everyone should know that purple mods are not permitted in highsec. Agents Votre Dieu, Rungerd, Narl' Amhar, Astrid Tyrfing, Artem Ice, and Ingrid Scylding enforced the Code and made a bunch of money--a win-win!

KILLMAIL

Victoire 'Vic' Beretton didn't quite live up to her corp's name: Intense Defense Tactics. This carebear barely had enough hitpoints to cover herself. Incredibly, she was carrying 5.4 billion isk in that busted-up old thing! A single Agent, NoPower Solutions, was able to reset the carebear's net worth to zero.

KILLMAIL

Cry Alf had a bad habit, and its name was "ORE". Agents Max August Zorn, Niels Henrik Abel, Felix Hausdorff, Augustus De Morgan, and Ernst Steinitz quickly located Cry Alf's 388 million isk Procurer and confiscated the ORE Ice Harvesters, both of which dropped.

In fact, the miner enjoyed the ORE Ice Harvesters for less than two hours before he was discovered; our Agents had sold the modules to him as part of a sting operation. Cry Alf's alt was caught 20 minutes later in a 386 million isk Procurer which hid its own pair of illegal ORE Ice Harvesters in the cargo bay.

Miners, take note: We are watching you.

KILLMAIL

Ah, the highsec jump freighter. So many have died in Uedama. Faultless Starch's blank-tanked 9.1 billion isk Nomad was executed in a traditional Kusion family ceremony. Agents Jason Kusion, Jacob Kusion, Jeremy Kusion, Josh Kusion, Jonas Kusion, Jeffery Kusion, Jimmy Kusion, Josiah Kusion, Jessie Kusion, Jayson Kusion, Johnathan Kusion, Joshua Kusion, Jack Kusion, Jackson Kusion, Joseph Kusion, Jayden Kusion, Jeremiah Kusion, Jake Kusion, Justin Kusion, and Joel Kusion put the AFK carebear to death. 'Tis a noble tradition.

KILLMAIL

Wozzlebatneoclone Breau made at least a little effort to protect himself while mining. He purchased a Skiff hull and equipped a few shield modules. But he couldn't resist the temptation to equip ORE Strip Miners. Before Wozzlebatneoclone knew what was happening, Agents Max August Zorn, Felix Hausdorff, Niels Henrik Abel, Ernst Steinitz, and Augustus De Morgan were hot on his trail. They eliminated the Skiff and its billion isk pod. Like I said, our Agents are always watching. Especially if you purchase expensive mining equipment from Jita.

KILLMAIL

Trrain was autopiloting in a simple rookie ship one day when he encountered Agent Stop Autopiloting. Trrain's rookie ship was popped, and then the Agent detonated the 3.1 billion isk worth of implants that Trrain carried in his head. I wonder what sort of excuse Trrain had for being ganked while autopiloting by someone named Stop Autopiloting. "Nobody gave me a warning"?

Crystal sets have been getting smashed at an alarming rate. Have the carebears forgotten who owns highsec?